back to life?

I'm not so stressed out now. At least, not like I'd been for the last few weeks. Guys & Dolls opened last week. Some time that week I wrote out some new parts for my multiple reed guy with some different instruments on a few numbers and a new cello part for "Luck Be a Lady". After opening night I wrote some exit music: a swing version of "Follow the Fold". It was the only thing left to do. We have 3 more shows this weekend, but all I really need to do is show up, do the show, and type up any band notes after. I'm actually not sure where the notes are from Sunday's show. I'll have to look around in/clean up my apartment.

I am still tired, and I feel like for a while now I've been pulled in several different directions. One of the biggest stressors for me has been that for several upcoming shows I'll be music directing, I've already had auditions but did not feel totally prepared to cast those shows. So far, it's turned out that when I was in the audition, and discussing casting with the directors, it seemed that I did know well enough what I needed: voice types, who sings what, etc. But I didn't feel as prepared as I normally would be. 

Man of La Mancha started rehearsals this past Sunday, after a G&D matinee. (I could use some Equity Mondays off...however I'm not doing Equity shows.) I knew what I needed to get done, but again, I didn't feel completely prepared. I've covered all the music, except that we lost our Antonia and shifted Fermina into that slot and are finding a new Fermina. New Antonia/old Fermina has worked a little on "I’m Only Thinking of Him" but not with the other characters. And I won't be at MoLM rehearsal again until Friday. I’ll be doing All Shook Up auditions & callbacks.

So, this may make me sound sort of full of myself, but... This being stretched in several directions and being under-prepared for all of them makes me feel the way I imagine "normal" people feel. I show up and do the best I can; I think I probably seem competent, but I don't feel like I really know what I'm doing. Normally, I feel like I really know the show and have a rehearsal schedule worked out, including how long I need to work each number, etc. 

Something different:

Now that G&D is open (that was a huge undertaking for me: orchestrating the whole show, generating & printing out decent looking parts in addition to being music director and rehearsal accompanist), I'm starting to think about my life again. All my "free" time is not so frantically consumed with getting things done anymore. And, of course, my life hasn't changed any, so I don't feel any better about it. I do have a new friend, from the cast, I think. We've been chatting a bit online. It'd be nice to hang out in "real life" some time, but with my schedule, I don't know if that's gonna happen.

Something else different:

This morning I woke up at 6:41am. I'm almost 100% sure that yesterday I woke up at 6:41am. And I'm fairly sure that on several days lately I've woken up around that same time. What the heck is going on at 6:41am and waking me up?