Ya know, some movies and stories just don’t have much of an ending—no denouement, just climax-and-we’re-done, like a dude who falls asleep the moment he’s done having sex. But that’s okay; The Lord of the Rings trilogy has a few to spare.
(A.k.a, so, the Ring of Power is destroyed, the dark army is defeated, and Frodo and Sam are saved by giant birds. Movie’s done, right? Nope.)
1. Frodo wakes up (in Rivendale?) and sees all his friends., a.k.a. The Wizard of Oz ending.
2. Aragorn is crowned King, everyone appluads, he gives a pretty speech, and he gets to make out with his girlfriend, a.k.a, the “It’s good to be the king” ending.
3. Frodo narrates that the Hobbits made it back home, a.k.a., the “all’s well that ends well” ending.
4. Samwise finally chats up the hot Hobbit chick from early in the first movie, cut to their wedding day, and all the Hobbits are happy, a.k.a., the traditional-comedy-ends-with-a-marriage ending(?).
5. Frodo narrates some more, writes in Bilbo’s/his book while melancholy music plays, complains to Samwise about his wound, narrates some more and accompanies decrepit Bilbo to the Elves ship, then Bilbo gets to make a last funny comment about the Ring, a.k.a., the sad but cute ending.
6. Gandalf gives a goodbye speech, a.k.a., the wise old dude ending.
7. Frodo leaves with the Elves (along with Gandalf and Bilbo) after a tearful goodbye to the other Hobbits, a.k.a., the actual sad ending, OR the long, drawn-out ending.
8. Samwise goes back home to the Shire (hot Hobbit wife and Hobbit kids), while Frodo narrates some more about life and the future, a.k.a., the actual ending, OR the unnecessary ending unless there’s gonna be a sequel—perhaps called Hobbits the Next Generation, or maybe Son of Sam...wise.
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