unfriends

I just lost another facebook “friend”, which prompts me to post this.

By the way, I’ve figured out who a lot of you are, and there are a few surprises. Oh well, whatever.

Dear ≈50 people who’ve unfriended me on the facebook:

(Yeah, I know they’re not gonna see this, but...)

I understand if the posts about my new blog made you uncomfortable. But, ya know, several times I’ve mentioned in a facebook post that if you don’t want to see these posts let me know. I could’ve taken you off the list.

I would never simply unfriend someone because they posted something I didn’t like. I might hide them from my news feed, as I have with a handful of people who constantly post religious claptrap &/or right-wing conservative nonsense &/or sports crap that I care nothing about. Or if I had a normal job where I was concerned with what my boss might see on my computer screen when I was on facebook during work hours.

But I wouldn’t unfriend you. I’d probably say something about it: maybe ask you to not post that to me, you know, make a list or something. Or if I found it really troubling or disturbing I’d say so. I might say, “Hey. This is really offensive...or troubling...whatever”. I would start an actual conversation.

Wow, imagine that, actually saying what you think. Expressing your feelings. Oooo, a confrontation.

Why is that so scary? Why can’t people handle that?



Update: 11-7-2011

In the news: NYC artist & public body-painting

Artist can paint nude models only after dark

(Reuters article)

So, this artist—Andy Golub—was arrested for painting nude models in public in New York City. New York State law allows public nudity by people “entertaining or performing in a play, exhibition, show or entertainment".

You can be naked if you’re “entertaining”, but not just because you like it? Well, whatever.

The court is allowing the artist and his model to go free, and the charges will be dropped in 6 months if they are not arrested again. He’ll be allowed to paint bare breasts any time, but during the day the models have to at least wear “g-strings”.

I’m not sure whether or not this is a good thing for public nudity proponents. It’s half-way good for artistic expression, in that he can paint mostly nude people, but a little bad that he has to wait until dark to paint fully nude people.

But on the bad side (for public nudists) is that the court is upholding a distinction: some nude is good and some nude is bad. Just being naked is bad, but naked entertainment is okay.

As is often the case, I don’t quite understand. 

bastards

Why is this acceptable...

...but not this?

And why is this...

or this (post ancient Greece/Rome)...

...much more common than this?

...and this?

Why is this sort of shocking or maybe even disturbing?

Okay, I know the reason, and you probably do too. White European males—those bastards—and their double standards concerning nudity (and sex).

We should all have a healthy sense of shame...but look at these “innocent natives” or “artistic nude depictions”.

Aren’t they the same guys who wanna keep people from having affordable health care and stop gay marriage?

...bastards.

Interesting article: Nat'l Geo nude discrimination

The Vagina Monologues

I support being against violence toward women. (That's an awkward phrase.) 

I’ve read The Vagina Monologues and seen a production. Maybe two? I think so. Well, I think one of them was a reading. It’s an interesting piece.

But I ask this: why no “Penis Monologues”? “My penis is like...some phallic object...” Or better yet, “My cucumber is like a penis..."

My screwdriver is like a penis..."

My TV remote...?”

Why no “Penis Monologues”? Because every other play being done is about dead white men and their penises.

...okay, maybe not.

What do men have to say about their penises? I’m not sure. Men? Chime in.

As for me, my penis is like...a penis.

(Yes, a rare moment: another penis on my penis-blog. Ya know, 

it’s not easy to find a decent picture of a normal, non-erect penis.)

Anyway, guys talking about penises would probably deteriorate into a list of “dick-names”. (Yeah, I kinda made that up, but feel free to use it.)

Reminds me of a suggestion that someone made that I write a “schlong song”. I replied that the idea strikes me as a bit more vulgar than something I’d do. She said I could probably make it something clever, but nah...it’s just not me. Again, it seems like it would end up as a list of penis names. You know, dick, cock, peter, willy...that sort of thing. Who’d want to wade through that?

(If you want to wade through that... here’s a list... ‘cause mine’s not that long. ¡Ha, a penis joke!)

I’m just not much on using creative or funny names for the penis. I typically say “penis”. Similarly, I typically say “breasts”. In fact, while I love breasts, I don’t much care for “tits” and even less for “boobs”. They both sound like a stupid person. (Probably because both words can also mean a stupid person.) Granted, some breasts may seem kind of dumb, but I don’t really want to use those terms for breasts in general. And to make them cuter or whatever by adding “-ies” is worse still. I don’t actually talk a lot about vaginas. I'm not sure why. It just doesn't come up much. So, I’m not quite sure what word I use. It depends on the context, I guess.

Well...back the whole vagina/penis monologues thing.

Since The Vagina Monologues is generally seen as a piece dealing with female empowerment and often specifically dealing with rape, incest, and violence against women...

...to actually write a “Penis Monologues” seems a little anti-The Vagina Monologues. Of course, it wouldn’t have to be, but the concept itself might be offensive to many feminists. I imagine the idea that men would need “empowerment” is foreign to most folk.

But I think that “male empowerment” is something worth exploring. I was chatting with someone not long after starting this blog, and I mentioned my feeling that male nudity or male sexuality should be explored. Whoever I was chatting with suggested that it has been, but I don’t feel that way. Maybe the stereotypical, aggressive, macho, male sexuality has been explored plenty. But that’s certainly not me.

I can't imagine exploring my "maleness" by going out in the woods, sitting around a fire, and grunting, yelling & banging sticks on the ground. Sitting around a fire having a conversation? Absolutely. But no sticks. And no grunting.

Okay...what is my point? (I often loose track of my point, don't I?) I guess my point is: I’m a male; I have a penis; I am a sexual being; and I have feelings about all that. As much as I’d like to think I’m open and articulate (or at least willing to write about stuff), I’m not always sure what my feelings are about all this stuff. 

Novelty

If you’ve been keeping up with this blog for any length of time, it’s likely that the sight of me naked is no longer shocking.

The novelty has worn off. Maybe that means you’re reading the text now. Someone I knew mentioned scanning through the blog to look at the pictures. I guess that’s okay, but I hope that’s not what most people are doing. I mean, if you’re just looking for penises, there are much better places on the internet for that. Penis‘R’Us-dot-com? I’m sure it’s out there.

(I’m having a sense that maybe I’ve written about this before. I’m at the point with this blog that I can’t quite recall if I wrote about something or if I just thought about writing about it. Maybe I should just not worry and write about things more than once if that’s what happens.)

I’m sure the same people on the facebook are seeing the posts that I “share”. That’s probably most of you folk reading this. I don’t know, though, who’s reading this. (I’m sure I written this before.)  There are some exceptions—a few people with whom I’ve chatted about this—but I wish I were getting more feedback. It’d be great to start some dialogue about nudity, social nudity & taboos, my penis, whatever...wait, maybe not that third one (heh-heh).

I’ve discovered that several people have shared links to this blog on the facebook. But I only know who one of them is. I can’t see the shares, as I normally can. I don’t mind that people I don’t know are seeing this, but I’m curious who’s sharing and who might be viewing.

Anyway...back to the topic of novelty.

I think the search for novelty likely feeds the porn industry. Porn consumers are looking for something new. I think watching the same videos (or whatever) over and over eventually loses its spark. Different people have to “couple” and perhaps more people have to “couple”...more has to become even more...bigger has to become even bigger...unusual fetishes have to become even more unusual...the unusual become the extreme...

What exactly does that have to do with my blog? Umm...not sure.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe people just don’t get enough of nudity. Maybe it doesn’t have to be more extreme or unusual to keep our interest.

I think about the “Naked News”. I’ve never subscribed to it, but I’ve seen a few clips. It’s women reporting the news while taking off their clothes. It’s really kind of boring. They’re not particularly great newsreaders. And they’re attractive women, but the “stripping” isn’t very seductive. Also, there’s no surprise, no suspense, no novelty. There are different women, but that’s about it. I don’t know what the reader turnaround rate is. It wouldn’t surprise me if they bring in new talent on a fairly regular basis. As boring as it is, they’d kinda have to. So maybe that is about novelty.

I have found that when I look at this blog or look for a picture that’s on the blog occasionally I’ll be surprised. Whoa! That’s me naked. It’s odd because I’m generally naked when I have that reaction, and I know I’m about to see a picture of me naked. Weird.

Also on this topic...there’s a musical called Naked Boys Singing. I’ve not seen it live, but there is a video that I’ve seen. [And you can find a few clips online.] I didn’t care for it. I’m fine with the idea of a musical with a bunch of dudes who are naked off and on throughout. But that seems to be all it is. I just watched it once, but I thought the music’s not great or clever or interesting. I don’t remember a lot of details, but there may’ve been some nice moments here and there, but nothing that would make me recommend it. I mean, if you want to see some fit, attractive (I guess—again, I don’t really remember) “boys”—they’re young men—singing, then check it out. (I used to have a copy; it was part of a gift bag for some benefit I was involved with in NYC. But I either gave it away or sold it.) If you’re looking for a good musical that happens to have a bunch of nude dudes, then keep looking. It’s not even a novel idea—onstage nudity (that’s another entry that I’ll write soon). But it’s something that a lot of people probably haven’t seen.

Maybe I should write a nude show, with good music and clever writing. I just need a good idea. And a theatre willing to produce it.

Anyone?

A few more quick thoughts on National Coming Out Day

In our attempts to describe ourselves and each other, we have a tendency to categorize. (It’s not just the Germans; we all do it.) And in exploring and embracing these categories, we have a tendency to think we are this category and therefore we cannot be anything not in this category. But that’s ridiculous.

Politically, I’d guess that most people hold some conservative ideas or feelings and some liberal. In terms of our cultural/”ethnic” backgrounds, most people have aren’t 100% anything, if you go back far enough; and go back even further, well, we were all something else at some point. Sexually speaking, I think deep down, if we put aside the fear, most of us probably have some attraction towards both genders. Most people find sex appealing on some level...except for those who, sadly, find sex appalling.

Some people are this way...until they become that way. Some people are the other way from as early as they can remember. Some people just couldn’t imagine it being okay to be some way, otherwise they probably would be. Some people are THE way, and rant & rail against the un-way, causing pain to lots of other people, while they secretly seek an outlet for their own un-waywardness.

A few quick thoughts on National Coming Out Day

Last year I wrote 2 long-ish entries. They’re still here. You can check ‘em out.

This year I’ll be brief.

Some people are tall, some are short.

Is there a genetic element to determining height? It seems that way.

Is there an environmental element to determining height? It seems that way.

The short people aren’t trying to make the tall people short. They just want the tall people to be aware of the shortness—that’s just how they are. Stop trying to make them be tall. And stop telling them that it’s wrong to be short.

Apart from the height thing, and a few associated issues (a tendency to bump your head, or trouble reaching the top shelf, etc.), tall people & short people are really no different.

Another thought today which doesn’t fit into my little analogy:

Sexuality is malleable. What you like can change. Sometimes a lot, sometimes a little.

What you feel and believe and support can change. Think about it.